Am I a Fraud?

72% of Women experience Imposter Syndrome at work

62% admitted they have rarely felt fully confident

45% "don't know what to do about it" *

This isn't ok! They are shocking statistics and they need to change.

Whilst it's normal to experience anxiety and doubt over our abilities and skills from time to time, it's not healthy when it becomes the daily norm. When that happens the following often manifests:

• Self-blame.
• Negative thoughts and feelings that persist.
• Feeling like you are faking it.
• An inner critic that very present.
• Comparison with others.

And at worst, burn out, a sense of unworthiness or shame, depression and an inability to let go and relax. 

These seriously derail your trust in yourself and your abilities.  

Then it's a short journey to feeling like an imposter with your confidence being eroded. This will be magnified if you're in a work culture that is dismissive ('I thought you said you were good at that ...'), disrespects its people or that actively fosters women being treated as 'less than.' 

Sadly, it's a lot more common than you imagine - and it's often covert, implied rather than directly stated, which means you have little or no come-back. 

Firstly, if you are a negative work situation - know this: it isn't you!

However, whatever your situation, clearing the patterns takes time and practice. The following points are a useful guide to find out if you have patterns related to feeling like an imposter. Do any of them sound familiar?

• You regularly experience a sickening knot of tension in your stomach.
• You work long hours with your family complaining they never see you. 
• You must get it right, and struggle to delegate.
• You fear failure and work extra hard to ensure you don't make mistakes.
• Any form of criticism is difficult to bear - as instead of being able to hear this constructively, you feel you have failed.
• You keep telling yourself, "I've just got to get through this."
• When things go well, you brush it off telling others, "Oh, it was luck. Right time, right place."
• You have a tendency to say, "My team are brilliant at what they do," but you don't acknowledge your part. 
• You are tired all the time, to the point of exhaustion and rest doesn't seem to help.

If you answered yes to three or more of the above scenarios, you're probably suffering from Imposter Syndrome (here on in Imposter Patterns). 

This is no way to live and feel fulfilled.

But the good news is, that Imposter Patterns can be reversed. You can reclaim and acknowledge your skills and the qualities you possess, as well as value yourself.

Imagine if you will, a different scenario.

• Where you now have mastery over these patterns. You may stumble and even crash, but now you rise up, more resilient. 
• You have the tools to help you discern any situation. Now you can review, evaluate, and use your common sense, intelligence and intuition. You don't make yourself a failure.
• You own your gifts and abilities, not in a showy 'look at me' way, but quietly confident. 
• You know and value the contribution your skills and qualities bring to your work. You value your team, and the respect is mutual. Collaboration is a key value in your work. 
• Most importantly, you know how to care for yourself.

No longer are you the last person on the list, or the one who works till past midnight. You don't need to because you are grounded in your integrity, with clear boundaries. You no longer strive for perfection, you will always do your best, but now you have compassion for yourself, and the journey of being human. 

If this scenario inspires you, and it's a place you would like to be,

Then, I can help.

Because, part of my purpose is to eradicate fear and those imposter patterns, to help women reclaim their wisdom, authority and own their magnificent story, from the inside out. This is way more powerful than relying on outer conditions or opinions.

In fact, as you can see, I don't call it a syndrome, because of the illness implication. It is simply a set of patterns, which maybe deeply imbedded, but they are patterns none the less.

And .. to my mind the statistics above should be a part of our history - not something 72% of women are living with day in, and day out.

Firstly, we must be brave enough to look the imposter in the eye and challenge its existence.  Then we track how it shows up, alongside creating simple practices designed to nurture you, tools to assist the change, and discernment to discover what the reality is.

If you are ready to take this journey, I’d like to gift you 3 surprisingly simple but effective tips that you can use straight away, to start letting go of these negative patterns.

You can do so by booking a FREE Courage to Be You Consultation, and if at the end you would like to work with me, we can discuss that as well. The important point here is that you are deciding that you would like to explore whether support is needed now, and if I am the person to help.

During this 45 minute to 1 hour consultation, we will:

• Review how those Imposter patterns show up in your life.
• Identify those 3 tips that will start to break the cycle of Imposter patterns.
• Understand why you’re so exhausted (and why rest doesn’t change a thing).
• Reduce shame and guilt around this story and start celebrating your unique gifts.

Ready to get started? Then Click on the link and book your session.

Looking forward to meeting you and hearing your story,

* Independent 7th April 2023. Summarised statistics